this is one of the last four blogs I will ever write. although I am sad to finish a tradition I began close to three years ago, this has become daunting and far from transparent. I used to be very clear and could name names, dates and locations. I used to attach photographs to my blog. it was fun. I am unable to share so much at this time in my life without risking others. if I cant go completely, I would rather abstain. I am a fan of wholeheartedness. I am a fan of oneness. I am also a fan of protecting what I love. he protects me and I protect him- that is LOVE.

blogging began for me as a means to promote people and things I believed in, paid me. it turned out to be a diary of my life. my life pays me more than promoting anything or anyone.  I am in love with the evolution of it. I will look at it and cherish the memories. I will explain it to my love and my son as it happened, moment by moment. its all there in black and white. I love the written word. it’s a contract in deed. it cant be lied about or altered. the spoken word is more often manipulated. my social media presence is strong. I will use it and my podcast for the purposes of promotion.

art basel was everything I thought it would be and more. roman had a blast and met some people he wanted to meet. I danced so much my body aches. salt and pepper beards are the salt of the earth. moscow mules have been my thing since the beginning of 2016.

the house looks like santa likes it. I am happy. this is for certain my last year breaking it down for his arrival. I am very much looking forward to relocating.  this house served its purpose and I am grateful. family was my goal and I achieved it. looking back at my life, I can be proud of sacrificing myself for roman.

I spoke to various college counselors this week and I am in a bit of shock. my bestfriend, my biggest protector and my greatest love is on his way to success. I am elated.

fitness will take on a different role for me in 2017. coaching has increased and personally I am at peace. planning for the new year is front and center. adulting is the new black.

when a man loves a woman, he would do anything for her. I am there. it is bliss. it only took me twenty five years to learn that. 

steroids and medicine that alter the body for muscle gain appearance should be banned. I see so many bodies ruined by this. the bulk look is so yuck.  roiderama is evident in the face immediately. it really is so unattractive to me. I love a strong upper body when it is natural. I love a thick torso. I love scars. I love them now more than ever before. perfect is boring. perfect is a lie.

love in real life is my new jam. I love when he kisses you, holds your hand. I love when he calls you, shows you off. I love faithful and proud. I’m in love.

I am working on two public events for the first quarter of 2017. they are both very different than what I have ever done. I am very excited about both projects.

solid gold is the new years theme. I am looking forward to a year of feeling like gold, being treated like gold and making gold. sometimes the silver is the gold.

hashtag abuse is ugly #hashtagless

and if you don’t know, really deep,



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